Today I’m 27.5 weeks pregnant. It’s awfully nice to see my belly move when touched and see baby kicks when daddy sings lullabies through my belly button. You understand: we have already bonded with our little man. However, this bond has certainly not always been existent. In this article I’d like to tell you more about this. Does my story sound familiar to you?
When you become pregnant in the Netherlands, you have to wait until week 9 (and sometimes week 13) before you get your first ultrasound. The ultrasound at 8 weeks was our first physical contact with a health care provider concerning my pregnancy; on the one hand a very exciting moment for us. Especially since I fell flat on my bottom with a weighted barbel in my neck. I already told you about that in this article about my pelvic instability. This little accident made me insecure whether everything would be fine with the embryo that I was carrying.
Mentally not pregnant
In addition, I had to get used to the idea of being pregnant. I often still feel like a girl and not a woman or grown-up; it therefore felt very strange to me being pregnant. It was a weird feeling walking into the ultrasound clinic waiting room, being confronted with I had recently become myself: a pregnant women. Physically I didn’t feel pregnant yet, let alone mentally.
Physically I didn’t feel pregnant yet, let alone mentally.
On the other hand we were very down-to-earth at that time, early in our pregnancy. This was mainly because we were very aware of the fact that we didn’t have an awful lot of guarantees regarding the viability of the embryo. We for example knew that there was a chance that there wouldn’t be a heartbeat at the first ultrasound or that the embryo would have stopped growing. Also, we had realized that many couples first have an unsuccessful pregnancy, before they have a successful pregnancy.
As such we didn’t rely on ‘the first hit’ to stick. If there would no heartbeat be detected, we would be well prepared and respond down-to-earth. We stepped into the ultrasound clinic waiting room light-hearted.
If there would no heartbeat be detected, we would be well prepared and respond down-to-earth.
Not accepting baby gifts
We were early for our ultrasound appointment. The sonographer therefore sent us into the Prénatal (our ultrasound clinic is located in the huge baby flagship store Prénatal) to kill time. I didn’t feel any need to go shopping in a baby store whatsoever; as I wrote earlier, mentally I was absolutely not pregnant yet and I am not the type of person that swoons over a romper.
I toned-down overly enthusiastic responses to our pregnancy.
In addition, I was, as I mentioned before, very aware that it was still unsure whether there would be a heartbeat observed at all. For that reason I didn’t accept baby gifts from relatives around that time and toned-down overly enthusiastic responses to our pregnancy with the purpose of ‘let’s wait and see. ”
Sobbing between the strollers
We are therefore just sat on a chair in the waiting room. Cleverly done Prénatal: from our seat we had an excellent view on shopping pregnant women in the store. In fact, to get into the waiting room, we actually had to walk all the way through the Prénatal. I imagined what it would be like to hear that your child does not show any sign of life at your first ultrasound appointment. How often would there be sobbing women that have to find their way back to their car through the strollers, bouncers and cute rompers? That could be me in a few minutes.
I was interrupted in my thoughts when the door opened and the sonographer called us in with a big smile on her face. We sat down at her desk to go over some details. Although the lady didn’t ask anything special in particular, I – down-to-earth girl – suddenly felt very vulnerable. That down-to-earthness suddenly seemed to have abandoned me.
Luckily I was soon redirected to the treatment table and the lights went out. Pfew! A blob of ice-cold gel and a searching device on my belly. Almost as soon as the device touched my belly, we heard a heartbeat as if it were a herd of galloping horses passing by.
Almost as soon as the device touched my belly, we heard a heartbeat as if it were a herd of galloping horses passing by.
Panda eyes and laughter
I don’t know about Maarten, but when he saw my panda-eyes and my waving hands as if I was doing a bad interpretation of a Miss World getting crowned while mumbling “this is so intense! This is so intense!”, he couldn’t stop laughing.. Presumably Mr. Maarten also suffered from a moment of reduced down-to-eathness. A pat on my shoulder and our thumbs up; the baby is alive! Against expectations we actually felt quite relieved. With a big smile we left the ultrasound clinic.
A pat on my shoulder and our thumbs up; the baby is alive!
Excited about my pregnancy
On our way out to the car through the baby store, I couldn’t resist looking at strollers from the corner of my eye. In the following weeks we started talking about the thing growing in my womb in terms of ‘the baby’, but it wasn’t until the 17th week before I would accept baby presents.
We made these pictures after we got back from our week 9 ultrasound. Obviously we were very excited about our pregnancy.
Since a while now we even call our baby by his name, he has already has a wardrobe until his 2nd year of life and I talk enthusiastically about my pregnancy. We enjoy the interaction we have with our little man and can’t wait until we can hold him in our arms. I guess I can conclude that bonding with our baby has developed very well!
Do you recognize yourself in the way responded to my pregnancy? Or did you instantly plunge yourself fully into your pregnancy? If you would ever become pregnant, how do you think you would respond?